Five Things I Learned When My Kid Puked

If you have a queasy stomach, you might want to stop now. But if you want a chuckle at my expense, please, keep reading.

We haven’t had a real tummy bug in our house for awhile – at least not one that picked on the kids. That changed recently. Here are a few gems I gleaned from the experience.

  • Food in your child’s hair is cute and picture-worthy if it finds its way there during dinner. It is NOT cute NOR picture-worthy if it finds its way there during the middle of the night.
  • If your child wakes you at 3am and says she puked, don’t assume this happened in her bedroom. Turn on the bathroom light before you use the washroom.
  • If you’re lazy and let her in your bed, intending to clean hers up in the morning, she will puke in yours a couple of hours later.
  • You clean up the kid, your partner cleans up the sheets. You smile, thinking you got the better end of the deal. Don’t be so smug. Wait until it’s you, her, and her little brothers, all strapped into the van and driving down the road – and she pukes.
  • My stomach is stronger than I realized (or perhaps my nose is just weaker …).

Bonus learning opportunity: I now know how to unhook her carseat.

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